Luhya Wedding Traditions

The Luhya community mostly resides in the Western part of Kenya with a population of about three million. Known for their elaborate ceremonies, the Luhya enjoy holding big parties to celebrate occasions. Luhya weddings are very elaborate and important occasions. They are accompanied with many wedding photos and celebrations. Before one gets married, the groom will have taken bride wealth to the bride's parents as a sign of gratitude. Unlike Toronto wedding ceremonies, bride wealth is meant to cement relations between the two families.

The first step before a Luhya traditional wedding can take place is payment of the bride price. The groom is expected to take a token of appreciation to the bride's parents to show that the parents raised their daughter well. Traditionally, this token would be in the form of livestock or farm produce. This token would act as a token to show how much the man cares for his future wife and show that he can provide for his future family as well. The Luhya community is known to love chicken and these are provided in plenty for guests to eat. On the wedding day, the man would go to the bride's homestead and call out the girl's name. If the girl responds, the ceremony can then go on. In the past, guests in attendance dress in special traditional attire with paintings all over their bodies and dance the whole night. The ceremony would last for about three days. The married couple would then proceed to their new home.

Present day Luhya wedding ceremonies are more modern and include celebrating the event in a church. Dancing and singing accompany most luhya weddings. Groups of women who sing praise songs encircle the bride. The wedding party normally arrives at the church a few minutes before the ceremony starts. The ceremony is usually recorded on video and wedding photos taken. This is one attribute that both Luhya and Toronto weddings have. Once the church ceremony is over, the wedding party goes to the reception venue for wedding photos and food. Luhya weddings have plenty of traditional foods to offer as well as western cuisine. Entertainment in a luhya wedding involves singing traditional songs and dancing to their tunes. Luhya dancing is quite vigorous and is a very entertaining activity. Unlike in Toronto, Luhyas can hold their ceremonies for as long as two weeks.

A Luhya wedding is not complete without speeches. The speeches normally come after gifts are given and wedding photos are taken but before the cake is cut. The theme of most wedding speeches is usually advice to the groom and his bride on how to take care of their new family. Grooms are advised to take care of the wife and the bride is advised to cook properly for the husband. Different people who may use a lot of proverbs and sayings to drive the point home give variations of the same message.

After the main event, the bride and groom go to their new home. The wedding photos taken serve as a reminder of the wedding ceremony. They can be passed down from generation to generation and act as a teaching aid to their children on the importance of marriage and families.

The Return of Victor's Ink

One of my favorite posts last year was my encounter with Victor, whose tattoos were numerous and wonderfully eclectic. The post was one of the first "tatalogs," as I call them, when a subject shares a multitude of their ink.

So, when I had just finished speaking with Austin about his sleeve, and saw a familiar face (and ink) hanging out in front of Fuse at the corner of 32nd and 7th, I ambled on over to say hi to Victor.

He had new tattoos, of course, and I soon had my camera out, adding to the tatalog.

I contacted him later to get the scoop on the work. Although he told me about it on the street, I didn't write any of it down, as I was too busy taking pictures. We've added five more pieces to the record here, and I'll let Victor narrate the rest:

The Divine Tattoo [just above his left wrist] was done by my cousin Ed Bonacore in the poconos. He is the only tattoo artist I really go to know. I trust him, he does good work. He works at this amazing shop in the Poconos called FUNHOUSE TATTOOING. The vibe there is cool from the colorful horror movie atmosphere, to all the artists and the friendly shop girl.

Anyway, I got the JOHN WATERS signature tattooed on [on my outer left forearm] last summer the day after I had met him with my best friend RUBY LAROCCA.


She got the same thing. She got him to sign his name to her arm as well! We make films and John Waters is one of our biggest influences so to have his mark on us for life is a reminder to keep making dangerous art.

I got the John Waters done at RED ROCKET TATTOO in NYC, I had to get it quick and fast so the autograph didn't fade. The artist's name slips my mind, but he was making a guest spot at that shop and he was originally from Texas. Red Rocket is one of the best shops in Manhattan.

So anyway, I got the autograph super big on my forearm, because in his movie Cecil B. Demented, all the characters get the favorite director tattooed on their arm. I though it would be pretty cool, to do that in real life, from the director that created that idea.

Back to Divine. Then I got the Divine tattoo because, how can't you love Divine. One of the greatest actors ever. I saw Pink Flamingos as a youngster, and I remember my parents talking about how this tranny was eating poop at the end of the film, and how they were all gagging watching the film! That got me really interested to say the least. And after Female Trouble, I know I would love anything these people collaborated on. I unfortunately cannot dig up Divine and get him to sign my arm, so [I] did a little portrait of him. He was a true artist, actor, performer, comedian, and I respect that.

Mink Stole, is also from the original DreamLand gang, and is in almost every John Waters film. She is amazing in Desperate Living, and when I met her, she was so sweet, so I figured with John Waters already inked into my arm, I would start the John Waters tribute arm. I met her at a horror convention in Baltimore, and one of the vendors was a tattoo artist, so I got the autograph, then got it tattooed and was able to show Mink by the next day. She was in shock.


The Taxi Driver tattoo [on my inner left wrist] was again done by my cousin Ed Bonacore...I have loved that movie forever, and think Travis Bickle [Robert De Niro's character] is the ultimate Anti-Hero. Its like an oil painting version of the shot at the end after he has killed all the pimps and scumbags in the brothel.

The quote on [the left side of] my ribs was also done by my cousin Eddie, but this is before he was in a shop.


It was done at this house after I had smoked a fat blunt and [was] high as a kite. It hurt a lot, my most painful tattoo. The side of the ribs hurts a lot because there no skin there, and every time the needle hits your skin, your ribs vibrate. It took 3 different sessions to do that tattoo. The quote is from a band called HUNCHBACK, that just split up. And it's from a song called "RED IS THE COLOR OF MY TRUE LOVES HAIR." When I saw the song live for the first time, I was convinced this would be my new favorite band. And I can honestly say, this is the best song ever performed live. It blew me away. And the lettering that was used is the font from THE WARRIORS. Another one of my favorite films!

So, there you have it, folks. Another block of Victor's tattoos! I can't wait to run into him again to see what's new!

Thanks once again to Victor for his generosity and sharing his ink with us here on Tattoosday!

The New Trend of Wedding Silk Invitation Boxes

Silk synonymous with luxury. Now silk is a good trend in the fashion world or the other. In fact, there are now designs wedding invitations with silk materials.

The times of sending a simple wedding invitation postcard to the whole family are over. More and more brides choose the exclusive way and order one of various invitation products including silk invitation boxes, silk pouches, folios and even silk envelopes.

Thai silk is one of the signature products from Thailand.
No question it suits just perfect to make exclusive wedding invitation boxes with pure Thai silk. There are no limits in creativity and extravaganza. For example embellished invitations with silk flowers or brooches with rhinestone crystals carefully ensembles on a padded silk envelope or silk pouches. My favorite is the rhinestone crystal rings with ribbon bands combined with a gatefold silk invitation box.

To plan a wedding invitation is truly a time-consuming process. Maybe because there are so many formats and possibilities the invitation box can be made in. Padded, not padded, embellished, simple, with or without flower arrangement and so on. It's all up to your time and budget.

Select the right material to meet your budget
Generally silk invitations are made with pure 100% silk or if your budget does not allow with Faux silk (artificial silk). Thai silk looks just so much more exclusive if you hold it against the light, but more and more brides choose the cheaper version of Faux silk invitations. No question, nobody wants to pay the debts of an expensive marriage until the silver wedding. Don't miss to contact me if you need support finding the right wedding favor, silk invitation box or wedding gifts.

Contact your invitation designer early to avoid delays
Thai silk invitations are hand made, so each item needs time to finish. If you place the order late, the manufacturer may not be able to manufacture high quality products. To get the best result, inquire 2 month before you actually need the invitation or wedding favor to arrive your home. This way you have around 4 weeks to discuss the design and look of your dream invitation box or silk invitation holder and the manufacturer has another 4 weeks to produce the order.

By : phie

Silky Wedding Flowers

Marriage is one of the sacred and historic events in our lives. Of course before getting married a lot of things that must be prepared and considered.

When brides choose their wedding flowers, one question they must ask themselves is: do I want real flowers, or silk?

Traditional brides always go for real flowers. Their delicate beauty can never be duplicated by artificial flowers. The mesmerizing scent of roses or lilies is a far cry from the artificially scented silk flowers. Scent is often associated with feelings or memories and a wedding is an emotional and memorable experience. And that is where real flowers score over silk ones.

Real flowers have their disadvantages, too. The main disadvantage with real flowers is their longevity. They wilt away very fast. Brides who want to preserve their wedding bouquets often settle for silk flowers. Moreover, brides who want exotic or out-of-season wedding flowers often opt for silk flowers because they are much more readily available and affordable. Silk flowers are also popular with brides who are allergic to real ones. No bride wants to be red-eyed and sneezing at her wedding.

Silk flowers have advantages and disadvantages too. Although not the traditional choice, silk is fast becoming a popular option. Silk flowers look almost as natural as real flowers and brides don’t have to worry about the availability of their preferred choice. Silk flowers are also much more affordable. Preservation of real flowers is very expensive, but not with silk. They always look as good as new.

Thus, both real and silk flowers have their positive and negative points. It depends on the bride to choose between them, according to her priorities.

By : Phie

CANDY STRIPE SAILORETTE

Sailor Tie Top - Tara Starlet (I love love love), Culottes - old H&M,
Lace kneesocks - Norlyn, Shoes - Fabbri

My dear friend K just turned 28 and held a tea party today with lots and lots of cakes, macaroons and mini cupcakes. All home made, all delicious.

K loves pink and candy so I gave her a gift with pink and candy on my mind. And I dressed up thinking pink and candy. And 1930's, sailors and sailorettes.

ANSWERS vol.1

I don't like to read long texts on a screen. I kind of of think that applies to everyone else (even though I know that it really doesn't) so I mostly try to keep my writings short. In order to avoid too much scrolling I'll answer the questions received so far now alrady.

Here's some Soft Sunday music to go along with the reading (or scrolling in case you don't give a F):




-I have always wondered what it is you really work with?
I work as a freelancing graphic designer, I do random commissions, but I also frequently work with a textile and apparel company together with my friend K. We do product planning, sketches and package design. I also work in the harbor as a cargo supervisor; we load and unload ships and I see that everything goes as planned. It's kind of blue collar.

Have you lived in Budapest? What did you do there.
-I studied graphic design in BP in 2003 at MIE; Magyar Iparmûvészeti Egyetem, which I believe is nowadays called MOME. My mentor told me "Budapest has a great nightlife, so don't take too many courses". I took his advide.

Any photoshop secrets or other editing tips and tricks you'd like to share ;)?
-Remember to save versions in between! And well, play around with adjustement layers etc. You learn a lot by doing and trying. And google up and read threads and forums.

How do you take such gorgeous pictures?!
-Heh, by taking many. Out of ten there should be one usable :)

Do you use hair extensions or is it ur real hair?
-Nips, it's all my own!

What's my favourite
Food: I like a lot, but tapas and meze dishes with good wine always works for me! And sushi.
Band : I used to say Interpol but nowadays I've distanced from it. I like rautalanka (and surf) the most, so bands that play that well! Most people find it rather geeky :D
Book : perhaps Orwell's 1984
Movie : Depends, it used to be A Clockwork Orange.
I don't really have a "number one" of anything, I like so many different things in different ways.

Do you work out?
-Too little these days - I used to work out six times a week at the gym, with yoga and savate (you get a little manic by doin it too often so that's not good either). Nowadays I go swimming about once a week and then try to squeeze in some hot yoga once or twice a month... I'm trying to make time for savate again, but haven't done it even once this year.

What languages do you speak?

-Swedish (mother toungue), Finnish, English, French, German. Some elementary Hungarian that I keep on forgetting more and more about. Since I speak Swedish I can get by on Norwegian and Dansih, it kind of comes as a bonus. I'd like to say Estonian too but I'm so bad at it I'm not sure it counts.

What do you usually eat during the day?

-Sandwiches

What is your favourite bar&club in Helsinki?

-For easy dining and wine Bar No9, otherwise perhaps Bar Loose. Right now all places seem a but dull. Autumn depression perhaps.

Are you one a diet or think what you are eating?
-
I eat whatever I want but in general rather healthy. I always have to have some uncooked vegetables with every meal. It feels great not to avoid anything anylonger, I don't care about carbs or calories.

Are you vegetarian?

-Yes, I've been quite a strict one but I have fish and eggs nowadays.

When did you became so stylish, have you always dressed that way? (oh thanks :)
-I've had different styles, some more some less stylish I guess but I've always paid attention to both details and the whole.

What kind of style you had when you were a teenager?
-
Black black black and slightly bohemian, after which I became something of an arty psychedelic hippie girl.

Height & weight?

-165 cm, I don't weight myself that often but something around 63 kilos I think.

How did you get the idea to start performing burlesque / How did you get involved in Burlesque performance?
-I've always loved the look of burlesque but it wasn't until I saw it live for the first time a couple of years ago (and Paula who was there with me told me "you have such a burlesque body!") I started thinking "I could do this!". Friends and friends of friends were also interested and we put together our group. Burlesque is new in Finland and the scene small, so it was easy to join in, we were definitaly in the right place at the right time!

What educations do you have?

-I'm a Bachelor of Arts, my major was graphic design. I studied painting before that for a year.

Do you have a boyfriend?
-Yes.

What's yout name?
-Ulrika

I would love to know the story behind your "förlåt mig" tattoo
-I took it after my previous relationship, when we broke off our engagement. It's says forgive me for his sake as well as my own.

Do you promise to answer me if I send you an email and ask about where to go and what to see in Helsinki if I ever end up there?
-Yes. But it might take some time before I answer it and you can remind me if it takes too long :)

How do you manage such a hectic lifestyle with freelancing, sewing, your job at the harbor, and burlesque and still manage to -look absolutely fabulous? (thanks again:)
Basically I never have any free time. Even if I take days off there is always something I should be working with... The good thing with my harbor job, and one of the main reasons why I'm still there, is that I have every third week free but still get paid for the whole month and have full vacations! That helps and also makes it pretty hard to quit.

Have you ever seen the comic Fritzi Ritz?
-
No, but now I have :D

Any tips on how to get the lipstick stay on your lips and how to avoid chapping at the same time?
-Hmm, I have sensitive skin and my lips get dry or irritated from time to time. I wear a fat cream from the pharmacy (like Bepanthen) during the night and put chapstick (like the blistex tube that doesn't really "stay on" the lips but) on in good time before the lipstick. Sometimes I just paint my lips with liner and put vaseline on for a more "lipstick look". (you need to bite it off a bit and add some more colour afterwards for an even result.) Have you tried changing to a more moisturizing lipstick? The Gosh soft n' Shine lipbalm has so much colour that it works more as a lipstick but is still pretty moist.

A.J.'s Floral Ink

I ran into A.J. earlier this month, walking aling Seventh Avenue near 34th Street.

She has seven tattoos, and shared this lovely black and gray floral piece on her upper right arm:

She had been debating on whether to add color or not, but is pretty happy with the way this tattoo looks.

This tattoo was created by Junior at Adrenaline Rush Tattoo in Newark, New Jersey.

Thanks to A.J. for sharing this lovely tattoo with us here on Tattoosday!

Oscar's Quartet of Tattoos

Born in Costa Rica, a one-time resident of Canada, and now a denizen of the Bronx, Oscar has traveled all over the world.

He expressed his passion for mountain biking to me as we talked in the Amtrak section of Penn Station.

This made sense to me as I had noticed his bike-themed tattoo on his left calf:


The wheel is specific to a mountain bike he owns, and it is connected around the back of his leg by a bicycle chain:


The detail is quite good, almost three-dimensional, and the tribal flourishes up and down the leg add volume to the piece.

This was his first tattoo, inked on his birthday, after many years of thinking about tattoos. He waited until he was ready, so that he could get something with deep meaning for him.

Since then, he has added three other tattoos, all created by Richard at Jent's Tattooing in Yonkers.

He graciously shared those as well. First is a tribal raven:


Oscar spoke of the raven's relationship with God. In the folklore, Raven helps the gods to raise the moon and the stars. He also is known as the prankster, who is always trying to catch the Sun.

In addition, there is a tattoo of Shiva, who Oscar acknowledges as a deity who "destroys ignorance and builds knowledge":


Finally, Oscar wears a Third Eye on his right bicep, which carries its traditional meaning:


Many thanks to Oscar for sharing his amazing tattoos with us here on Tattoosday!

QUESTIONS & ANSWERS

I'm not really an arrogant A hole. But I am rather unorganized. And very busy.
I tend to forget to answer questions I get in my comments. Sometimes it can take me a long time to answer blog related mails written to me too.

So I thought I'd do this thing were you can ask me anything and I will answer almost everything!

This is my sneaky-suspicious look when I say, ok, go ahead and ask then.

I'll answer a couple of questions/requests I remember now straight away
1. Make up
I get lots of questions about makeup. But the thing is, I will never do a makeup tutorial - there are tons of youtube tutorials out there that go for the same look and they're all pretty much similar to each other. I do the same make up almost every day, just make it heavier and add some glitter for shows. And in the end you still have to see what suits your own face the best.

But I will do a post about makeup; which products I use and some tricks I rely on, that I promise!

2. Photos
"I'm always curious about whether you take all your own photos and how you always manage to get the lighting so spot on? "
Well, first of all I have a pretty good camera. Not a great one, but an OK that can take great pics if you do it right. If there's not time nor good light for getting it right, I fix the photos in Photoshop afterwards, Levels, Curves etc. Basically there's nothing I can't do in Photoshop, although I prefer to get away as easily as possible. (Well as you can see the photo above has some more playing around than just levels and curves - sometimes that's real fun too - especially if you should be working with something different than making yourself look all 1939 for example :) I indulge quite a lot what I like to call "forced photography" -heheh- as I have my sister or a friend take some pics for my blog ("You have to take some pictures for my blog now!"), but I do take many of them on my own too.

That's it. If you post a question here during the weekend and perhaps the beginning of next week too I promise I'll answer them all by next weekend in a post!

Oh, and if you come here a lot and react a lot and I have forgotten to link you let me know!

Gregory's Defenders of the Faith Tattoo

Gregory walked by me on Seventh Avenue in front of Madison Square Garden and I saw a familiar icon from my youth:


As a huge fan of Judas Priest in the 1980's, I recognized the basis for this tattoo immediately: the cover art for the 1984 album Defenders of the Faith.


Gregory has four tattoos and is a fan of Japanese-style art. This album and its predecessor, Screaming for Vengeance, boasted cover art that had a distinct Japanese influence.

He worked with the artist, C-Jay at Rising Dragon in Manhattan, to modify the design slightly, removing the tank treads and other militaristic elements from the original design.


Thanks to Gregory for sharing his amazing tattoo with us here on Tattoosday!

RESULTS OF HAVING THE FLU pt.1

I've been ill the whole week and have spent my time here at home reading, drinking lots of tea and (yes! yes! finally!) organizing my desk and drawers ...and also, doing lots of online shopping. That's why I will never have space in my wardrobe - as son as I sell something away new items come in. Oh, materialism, oh vanity! (And that's why I'll never be rich either. But at least I'll die well dressed.)

A pair of boots I ordered late on wednesday night arrived today already, brought straight home to my door! What more can a little piggie-flu girl ask for?

So, here we go with a familiar pattern:

(the cat will, of course, be in the box the same second I take the shoes out of it...)

Oh yeah.


Oh yeah! The Melissa Ashanti flocked boot. Water resistant. Me likes.

Yeees. Rainy days, here we come!

The fact that I now own a pair of water resistant shoes for autumn make me very very happy. It's like I never really believed I could actually have a pair of pretty shoes that can master the nasty weathers to come. Plus that they're vegan too. I ordered mine from Luis Via Roma, and the FedEx home delivery was included in the price! (Well, with the range -and price- of the other items in their store, I'm not surprised.. :)

Both cats are in the box now.

Exotic Muslim Weddings

Anyone who has witnessed a Muslim wedding, live or on television, would be blind not to notice how colorful and exotic it can be. If there is one word that can describe one of these events, then it would be amazing.

What makes these occasions amazing is the fact that it follows years of tradition that has been passed from generation to generation. Muslim weddings are a lot different from Christian weddings not only because of their colorful attires but also because of the customs that are followed from the start of the couple's engagement.

While a Christian wedding is seen to be a romantic union of two people in love and united by the religious ceremony, a Muslim marriage is more of a social contract between the two families involved. Most, if not all of these marriages become possible due to the dowry system, which is more like an economic transaction rather than a romantic union. Here is how a Muslim wedding is celebrated in some parts of the world.

Iran

A wedding in Iran can last up to seven days. The focal point of the ceremony and the reception is the bride's home, which undergoes a customary banquet where the food is arranged so that it faces east. Iranian Muslims use a silk table cloth for the wedding table which has been passed from one generation to another.

Pakistan

An event in Pakistan can last up to three days, with the Mehndi taking place in the house of the bride and groom. It also follows a henna ceremony with the Nikah or the signing of official papers as its highlight. After the bride's family signs the papers in the Imam's presence, the family of the groom hosts a banquet as a way of formally announcing the marriage.

Malaysia

An affair in Malaysia is quite different in the sense that the henna ceremony takes place only for the bride. The signing of the contract is made in the presence of a Syariat Court official and is made official after a small amount of money is exchanged.

Singapore

A Muslim wedding in Singapore is characterized by the kidnapping of the groom by the bride's beautician and her family. The groom is allowed to enter only after he has given a reasonable amount of money as entrance fee.

Muslim weddings are celebrated in various ways depending on what country the couples reside. But whatever the differences, they will always be exotic and interesting to the western world.

Leah Dizon

Hairstyles For Brides With Long Hair

There is an old custom that when a woman gets engaged, she should start to grow her hair. There is no doubt that having long hair will give you a lot of flexibility in choosing both your hairstyle and headpiece for your wedding. There are a few things to keep in mind when choosing the perfect wedding hairdo for long hair.

The first question is whether to wear your hair up or down. This will depend, in part, on just how long your hair is. Very long hair, while very pretty, also requires a lot of brushing to look neat over the course of a long day. This type of maintenance is totally impractical during a busy wedding day. If your hair is only sort of long, flowing waves can be a very romantic look.

A nice compromise is to pull some of your hair back, and let the rest be down. This is great for brides who love their long hair and want to show it off. It's also a nice idea if your fiance has always loved to see your hair long and loose. Pulling some of your hair back will also give you better options for anchoring a pretty piece of hair bridal jewelry, like a comb or delicate tiara. When your bridal hairstyle is all down, the only type of hair jewelry that tends to work is a wreath, which has pretty limited uses.

Many brides with long hair will choose to wear it up, and having it long means that it can be sculpted into all sorts of intricate hairdos. When you are thinking of an updo, it is very important to have at least one trial run with your hairstylist before the wedding. Your regular stylist might be terrific at cut and color, but not all of them excel at formal hairstyles. With long hair, you might need to seek out a stylist who specializes in working with your hair length.

Finding the right stylist is particularly important for brides whose hair is very long, like waist length or even longer. A true story: the day of my wedding, all of my bridesmaids had come to my salon to have their hair styled. One of my bridesmaids had exceptionally long hair, and when the stylist saw it, he looked at her and said, "What am I supposed to do with this?"! Fortunately, a different stylist stepped forward to take care of her, and she looked beautiful in the end, but not before a few tears were shed. It is bad enough to see this happen to a bridesmaid, but imagine if it was you on your wedding day. That is why trial runs are so critical.

Another great reason to have a practice hairstyle is to see how it feels. If you have a lot of hair, or it is thick, having it all piled on top of your head can actually give you a headache! For brides who find that to be the case, a low bun at the nape of the neck can be a more comfortable option, as can wearing the hair half down.

There are so many wonderful looks that you can create for your wedding with long hair. One very pretty style is to have a series of braids woven into a bun at the lack of your head. A classic chignon is another lovely updo for a bride. It is a great idea to go through magazines and pick out a few looks that appeal to you. Don't limit yourself to wedding magazines, either - you can often find the most chic looks at celebrity events.

Long hair will give you so many choices for your wedding. All you have to do is narrow it down to your favorite look, whether it is classic, romantic, or cutting edge. With so many wonderful options, you are sure to find a style that makes you feel absolutely beautiful.

Merci Celebrates Female Empowerment with a Classic Image

I spotted Merci in Penn Station with this familiar icon on her calf:


The tattoo is based on this famous poster from World War II:


This image is identified with the character of Rosie the Riveter, and was introduced by Westinghouse to rally the home fires in support of the troops abroad. The image has transformed, through time, to take on a greater meaning, that of female empowerment.

This tattoo, one of three that Merci has, was created by Chris Dilworth at Tough Luck Tattoo in Lewes, Delaware.

Thanks to Merci for sharing her amazing tattoo with us here on Tattoosday!

Tattoos I Know: Avital's Ink

It seems odd and yet is not beyond comprehension that, at the last two bat mitzvahs I have attended, I came home with tattoo pictures.

The first time (documented here) was a pleasant surprise. On Saturday, August 8, however, I had no expectations, as it was my daughter's bat mitzvah.

However, much to my amazement, I noticed that one of my sister's closest friends, Avital, has two small tattoos. I was more surprised, considering that Avital is a cantor, and that whereas tattooed Jews are not as rare as they used to be, an inked cantor is still an unusual sight.

Granted, her two tattoos don't jump out at you. The om on her right ankle:


and the slender "b+" on her right wrist


are discreet enough to be overlooked by a discriminating eye, and yet these two small tattoos are large with meaning.

Avital gave me a synopsis the day I took the photos, summing up that the "b+" was a personal message to herself to always "be positive," and that it is her blood type, but she has since offered up a lengthier, more thorough explanation, which I'll share here:

" [The b+], though it is very small (1/2") represents many important parts of my life: past, present and future. When my college friend, Erica died in December from Leukemia, I was devastated. Throughout her illness, she managed to have good spirits and enjoy time with her friends and family. Her battle against cancer put life in perspective for me. I have struggled with depression most of my adult life, and when she died, I made the conscious decision to turn my life around, completely. The morning after her death, my father was diagnosed with Glioblastoma, an aggressive brain cancer. Double whammy. My sister and I had both been contemplating a tattoo for several years, but Jewish guilt always managed to turn me away. After several hours in the ER with our father, we ventured down to Kingdom [Tattoos] and got our matching b+ tattoos. It's incredible how much strength I find from this little symbol on my wrist.

And Avital added:

"And the B in the b+ tattoo is a flat. in music. since I'm a musician. I can't believe I forgot that part! flats are most commonly associated with minor, "sad" keys. so, there is a bit of sadness in the tattoo. too."

As for the om, she elaborates:

"One of the major changes I made in my life after E died was a regular Yoga practice. An unfortunate encounter with a sharp blade left a 1" scar on my inner right ankle. After about 3 months of drawing an OM over the scar with a sharpie (so tedious!) I decided to make it permanent. The OM, like my b+, centers me, calms me, and reminds me of the simpler, more important things in life."

Much thanks to Avital for sharing her tattoos and the powerful stories behind them here with us on Tattoosday.